Hi, I'm Ellie!

 Hello friends!

I thought I’d start a blog where I can talk openly about all things work. The only social media that I have is Twitter; and with a word limit I really can’t express a lot of what goes on inside my head. I figure this could be a fun way to express myself, and it also gives the reader an insight into my thoughts, my job, and the service I provide.

I’ve been sitting in front of my laptop for about half an hour, trying to decide what I should write about first - I have so many ideas! But maybe my first entry should be about how I entered the industry?

Hi, I’m Ellie!

I am an escort / companion / sex worker / whore (however you want to say it, but please don’t use the ‘P’ word). I am based in Canberra, the capital city of Australia. I grew up here and I really love it. I have had a few short stints living in other cities around Australia but I always end up coming back home. 

I always wanted to be a sex worker. I don’t remember how old I was when I figured out that this could be a job, but I was young. Probably too young to have been thinking about it to be honest. I remember thinking how amazing it would be to get paid to spend time with gentlemen. I remember thinking that the lifestyle would be extravagant, that I’d surround myself with rich and beautiful people. I’d drive fancy cars, eat at fancy restaurants and own fancy shoes and clothes. I would be a sensual, sexy, rich woman of the night. Boy, was I dreaming. Lol.

It took me a few years after I turned 18 to have the guts to get started in the sex industry. I was always waiting for that perfect time - wait until I don’t have a boyfriend, wait until I lose more weight, wait until I have a bit more money so I can buy the expensive clothes and shoes. 

I entered the industry when I was 22, newly single, poor and a size 16. 

I was quite a sexual person in my youth and as a young adult. I had already slept with a bunch of guys and thought I was pretty hot stuff. Even though I was often self-conscious about being 20kgs overweight, I felt like I could pick up any man who I wanted.

My ex at the time is what gave me the push to contact a brothel. Not directly of course. We had broken up because he was utterly obsessed with a gorgeous woman who he went to school with, and it just so happened that she was also an escort. It made me really jealous! Jealous that SHE had my boyfriends attention and that SHE was in the industry that I so desperately wanted to be in! Oh the glamour! I made out to my friends that I was starting work as a whore out of spite, but I knew that I had always wanted to take this path anyway. I figured the signs were there and now was the time. I look back now and I wish I could have been more honest with myself and those around me. But I also wonder if I ever would have taken the leap if this never happened?

I remember my first shift. I had no fancy lingerie; and I didn’t want to expose my big tummy in a bra and panties. So I wore a nightie. A sleek, black satin slip. It was old. It was frayed in some parts. It was faded so it actually looked green in some lighting. It was probably really unflattering and I probably should have just worn a pretty dress. I had no money to buy anything new and nice to wear for my first shift. How embarrassing.

I felt like an imposter. I felt like a hobo! The girls at the brothel were so much prettier, skinnier and more confident than I was. They had the most gorgeous outfits, nails and hair. They were kind though. They were actually really, really nice and welcoming. They showed me the ropes. I still to this day really appreciate the support and sense of community that I felt while working in that brothel. 

I raked in the cash that night, to my surprise. I remember getting home in the early hours of the morning and opening the envelope of cash that the receptionist had given me as I left - and realising that I had made at least a week’s worth of salary in only one night. How the fuck can it be bad if it gives me this kind of freedom? And of course, I took myself on a shopping spree to buy myself some new outfits and lingerie for work. 

I loved how this job made me feel. I initially felt like a sexy badass with a double life. I was so confident and I loved myself. I could afford to hang out with friends, go shopping and eat out with them; instead of being the poor friend who says I can’t afford a coffee or drinks. I loved the lifestyle. I slept late in the mornings, took myself out in the afternoons and worked during the night. It was bliss.

I stayed loyal to that brothel for a while. I started doing day shifts too. I would venture to Sydney on occasion and work in an establishment there. My shifts started to lessen as time went by, this was my choice. Looking back, maybe it was burn out. But I would wait until I had spent all my money before I would go and do another shift. 

Then, I met a guy. I didn’t meet him through work, and he didn’t know this was my job. We hit it off and fell in love really quickly. Almost just as quickly, he had figured out I was working. We had a fight about it. I felt really bad for not telling him and I promised him I wouldn’t work again. So I stopped and we did the whole couple thing. I was back working in retail, making shit money. I would often think about going back to work. I didn’t go back - until we broke up a few years later. 

This is when I decided to start working privately. I had a realisation that it wasn’t actually that hard to work independently AND I didn’t need to give anyone a cut of my earnings like I did at the brothel. This opened up the opportunity for me to make a better income. Yes, I had costs of hotel rooms and taxis but I could also raise my rates to cater for this. And they paid. Again, I was living the dream! The money and more importantly, the time and freedom to do what I wanted. 

I’ve been working privately ever since. I have had a few boyfriends here and there, and I’ve always been honest with them about my past in the sex industry. This wasn’t always well received, but I’d prefer them to know early on and not find out down the track and feel lied to. Sadly, a few times my honesty  backfired and they’ve tried to use it against me - or out me to family and friends. Ugh. Just don’t do that. 

In the past when I’ve had relationships, I always felt like I had to give up work and move back into a ‘normal’ job. I’ve been in and out of this industry for 13 years. I’m really tired of being with people who can’t see this work as a legitimate job. For me, being self-employed is really important. I need that flexibility and ability to work my own hours. I’ve made a promise to myself that anyone who I date needs to be ok with me being a hooker.

Sex work is a huge part of my life - its who I am. My clients are so varied; their background, work, culture, physical appearance and age; it’s always been that way. But some things have changed within my service and my attitude as I’ve gotten older and grown in the sex work industry...

Where my initial feelings around work were money, glamour, and sexy friends, I’ve really grown into such a different person. My values and desperation for fine things and social status have really changed! Sex work for me now is less about the glamour, more about the flexibility and connection.  I love hearing my clients’ stories and getting to know them on a personal level. It makes me feel good knowing that I’m making a difference in their lives, and I hope they know that they also touch mine.

My work goes beyond sex; it’s community, connection and touch.